STRESS, HONESTY AND HYPOCRISY: DR. SHRINIWAS KASHALIKAR

One of the causes of STRESS is lack of adequate and satisfactory communication.

Even as the world has come closer through technology; most of us; are suffering from the STRESS of lack of adequate and/or satisfactory communication.

Why could this be so? Why in spite of internet, mobile phones, video conferencing and speedy transport facilities, we still get this sort of STRESS?

If we carefully study; then we find that we are in situation where there is; “water; water everywhere; but no water to drink!” In other words; it is not the lack of coming together and meeting physically, or connecting of people through the internet, cell phones etc; and talking; but it is our inability to communicate heart to heart; that is causing STRESS!

Since we are trapped and engrossed in the values of chasing the mirage of individual pursuits, such as power, money, fame, glamour, glitter and so on; we have forgotten our own conscience! We are unable to reach our own subconscious and unconscious stratums.

In fact; we have knowingly or unknowingly; deserted our innate core and stopped communicating with our selves! As a result; we are unable to listen to our “own” inner voice and know, understand and feel our own “selves”! We do not know our own innate aspirations, our desires, and our urges.

Whenever we are disturbed by the STRESS of being lonely or dejected and miss communication; we frantically try to communicate! But our communication remains restricted to issues irrelevant to our soul; and hence does not satisfy us!

We give vent to our feelings; but only after filtering them through the doubts about acceptability, fear of condemnation, apprehension about fall in our own evaluation, shyness to accept our basal aspects publicly; and ignorance about intricate activities going on in our body tissues and cells!

In addition there are filters of our limitations of the knowledge of language and the inherent limitations of the language itself; to express the objective truth!

This makes us dishonest; though most of the people may not call us so; and we also may not think so! We are ignorant and oblivious about our dishonesty!

This is not restricted to our talk. It applies to writing even more. The question; “Can we express truth or interact heart to heart?” does not arise if we are writing reports, news, fiction, research papers etc! Because, these things are fairly clear. These things deal with facts. They may be true or false.

But, this is not so when we are engaged in vague, ambiguous, philosophical questions and answers; regarding abstract ideas and exploring our innate and objective perceptions. Hence this question arises more often; after writing for years; on what we presume to be “Absolute Truth” and “discover to be otherwise”! This is because; after repeatedly trying to catch the “Absolute Truth from deep within us” in words; we experience that whatever is written by us; becomes merely relative and subjective perceptions; and not absolute “Truth”!

It is obvious that we are not lying or cheating; knowingly, intentionally or deliberately. In fact; there is a genuine feeling that we are expressing “Absolute Truth” from our conscience. This is why we are frequently adamant and insistent about our opinions; beliefs, dogmas and superstitions, which we think are “Absolute Truth”. This often makes us; obstinate, inconsiderate and even fanatic.

If we carefully think; then it becomes clear; that most of the times what we write is limited by “characteristic limitations of our brain, the number of synapses, the synaptic connections, synaptic interactions, neuro-hormones, hormones and autonomic nervous system and environment inside and outside. Even apparently remote facts in space and time influence our perceptions and our articulations.

Hence most of our writing is discrepant from Absolute or Objective Truth! It is away from reality. It is relatively superficial and peripheral; even if it appears to us; to be full of intense, deepest and egalitarian emotions; and judgments!

Our limitations and our shackling idiosyncrasies, whims, fancies and ego; can manifest; even if we are honest in our day to day functioning also; and make a lot of difference (positive or negative) to the people if we are in a decision making position; such as political, spiritual, and economic leaders; opinion makers and judges!

When we are trapped in the confusion, uncertainty and dilemma of what we expect from ourselves; and what we actually feel and do; we are STRESSED! This is the STERSS of being hypocrite. We try frantically and in vain; to overcome such STRESS by “assuming actually to be” “what we think; we should be” rather than being what we are!

When we get “pulled” between; “what others should think or believe us to be” and “what we believe we are”; we get stressed! This is because “we are not what we believe to be” and we can not know and determine “what people think; should think or believe us to be”!

We try to manage such stress by hiding things which we think people would not approve; and show, exhibit and advertise things, which we think people would appreciate! This hypocrisy results from fear of defamation, shame, insults, dejection, punishment etc!

Often we condemn others for being hypocrites!

But actually; most of us are hypocrites. This is because we do not understand ourselves and we do not understand whether others understand us not! Actually it is impossible to “know” “ourselves” and of course; “otherselves”!
The “self” of every one of us is beyond intellectual definition and concrete and constant identity. It is not even possible to know in their entirety our own and others’ perceptions, feelings, instincts and needs; because they are not too subtle and rapidly changing!

It is true that we like to come together. It is also true that coming together, staying together and working together are all part of life. Coming together and celebrating has a lot of morale boosting capacity. Hence there are festivals and get-togethers, which play a vital role in society. Coming together also involves a variety of joint projects and missions.

But our self created obstacles determined by our values; come in the way of our honest heart to heart communication; and cause the STRESS!

These obstacles are independent of technology; and cannot be overcome by technology. The technology is like the wiring and the bulbs; and the obstacles in communication; are like defects in the “powerhouse”! Mere additions and/or corrections of wiring and bulbs; cannot be curative!

Let us understand that this is exactly why; frequent chat, gossip, flattery, accolades, fame, popularity, celebrations, festivities and other awards and rewards; though elevate the mood; do not reach the soul.

Let us interact with our innate core; and the innate core of the others; and conquer the STRESS of the lack of adequate, satisfactory, heart to heart and honest communication! This is definitely possible; through; NAMASMARAN; which taught by immortal gurus and which is like oxygen; that enlivens, integrates and blossoms us from within by rectifying the “powerhouse”! This is true networking!

We may not accept all this or believe in it; but verify it through our own experience.